March 29, 2012

King of Hearts: Getting Back with Your Ex Part 2

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Written by: Ralph King
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I hope everyone enjoyed the first half of this article where I talked about the things you need to consider before getting back with your ex. In this one, I will be giving some tips on how to get them back.

So you’ve now decided that it’s a good idea to get back with your ex after thinking it through. Now the question is, how do you get them back? If they’re the ones who want to get back together with you, then you don’t really have much to worry about. However, sometimes you’re the one that needs to do the extra mile. Here’s how to win your ex back:

1. Take it slow

No one wants to be bothered by a barrage of annoying text messages or Facebook wall posts and hear you beg to be taken back. Not only are you setting yourself up to be a doormat, but you’re also probably scaring off your ex. Take things slow and maybe contact them once or twice a week just to ask them how they’re doing. If you’re getting positive responses from them, then up this frequency and build that comfort once again. Remember, this is a process that takes time. Rushing things will most likely not end well for you.

2. Behave well

Always remember that you’re trying to win them back. Yes, you’re single, but now you can’t do everything single people do. The first thing you need to do is to cut off all the people you might have been seeing or flirting with since your breakup. Nothing says you’re sincere more than letting your ex know that they’re the only one. Skip the parties and the drop the player hat and you’ll have a better chance of getting your ex back.

3. Look good

I’m going to assume that you didn’t attract your ex before by being a couch potato. Just because you’ve gone out with this person before doesn’t mean you can slack off with your looks when you’re trying to win them back. Groom yourself, dress nice, and maybe hit the gym. As much as we want to think of  ourselves as being non-shallow, the truth is most people care about looks to a certain degree. Not only does looking good make you more attractive, but it also shows some effort from you and that you care.

4. Flirt

Unfortunately, attraction is not as easy as just looking good, especially when it’s your ex that you’re trying to attract. Luckily for you, you already know this person to the core. You know what they find funny, you know what they find attractive, and you know what they want to hear. So use it to your advantage and rebuild that attraction again through flirting. Make sure you don’t overdo it to the point that it makes you look insincere. But there is nothing wrong with having a little fun in this reconciliation process.

5. Spend some time with them

Today, technology allows us to communicate without being physically with one another. But there is still something about being in the presence of one another that makes the experience more intimate. You can use technology to your advantage, but don’t forget to spend time with them in person. Go on a casual lunch or maybe see a movie together, just like how it probably all began. Soon enough, as comfort and rapport  continue to build up, affection and intimacy will follow.

6. Forgive and forget

Before the two of you make it official, you need to have the talk of making sure it doesn’t result in a breakup again. Talk about the reason for the breakup, what has changed, and never talk about it again. Whatever happened in  the past already happened and if both of you want to move on from that, you’ll have to look forward and forget about the dark past.


Getting back with you ex has a lot of advantages. It will feel as if you’re entering a new relationship with all the excitement but without the uncertainty.  But perhaps the best thing about it is that all the previous experiences didn’t go to waste. The only thing you have to worry about is making sure your relationship doesn’t end up in a disaster again.

About the Author

Ralph King
Ralph King
Ralph King is one of the two Editor-in-Chiefs of recultured.com. He is a 5th-year Communications student who is passionate about advertising and media studies. His hobbies include obsessing over the NBA and listening to Hip-Hop music. Once in a while, you'll see him strolling the streets with a DSLR.

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  • Geneva Chris

    Alice from California, please For readers and especially the owner or author of this site please don’t see my message to people here as a spam or anything wrong. I’m trying to share my testimony to whom it may concern and i really want to express how happy i’m.I got my ex back with the help of a very powerful spell caster named Priest Ajigar, i never believed in love spell casting, others who may be reading my testimony right now might be having this doubt if this is real, even if your ex is with another lover he can still help. I want to seriously advice that if you find out that your relationship is not as stable as it used to be or you already broke up with your partner at the moment and you have tried all possible ways to get your ex back? Priest Ajigar is known for using pure spell and he does not do dark or black magic. Here is his email:priestajigarspells@live.com contact for those who are really tired and want a quick solution to their marriage issues, relationship, fertility problem, financial problems, your partner is a drug addict, are you looking for a medical herbs to cure your illness? Priest Ajigar is genuine and he has powerful spell caster that can put an end to all the problems that gives you sleepless night no matter how the situation is

Read previous post:
King of Hearts: Getting Back with Your Ex Part 1

One cannot simply generalize that it's always a good idea to find a replacement after a breakup. There are lots...